The Internet is for... lorn? Pt. 1 Or, Twitter is not a cocktail party.

It's August, 2011, and for some, the Internet, and the social media that are possible because of it, continue to stump some folks like Shaggy 2 Dope and a magnet. 

1) Definitely the most momentous thing that happened last week was Alton Brown deleting his Twitter. The Cod made fun of this before clicking through on the story, and it's even better than one might expect:

"The way I see it, Twitter is like a big cocktail party," Alton Brown wrote on his blog. "If I was at a cocktail party and someone puked on my wife’s shoes, odds are excellent that we’d leave. Does that mean I won’t attend any more cocktail parties? Maybe not. Maybe I’ll just have to figure out a way to host my own cocktail parties where people have to actually be accountable for their behavior."

(Brown does not account for people who seek out parties where people puke on their spouses' shoes, but I digress.) The problem, for Brown, is actually that Twitter is not like a big cocktail party, in that a cocktail party with millions of folks who do not necessarily have a material existence would be a hard one to get a drink at. The advantage of the cocktail party analogy is that it allows Brown to imagine the world of social media as one where everyone knows everyone, and agrees to abide by the same standards of etiquette. When Alton Brown figures out a way to host his own cocktail party -- moderated comments on ThereaintnopartylikeanAltonBrownparty.com? -- it will be interesting to see if it gets the same kind of traction as Twitter? 

Also, "get over it" might not be a bad piece of advice. A spoof Twitter account is a sign you've arrived. Just ask Tony Bourdain and Ruth Reichl. Hell, even the president of the University of New Hampshire has a fake twitter. 

Comments

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What a load of mule shit. All of this makes me want to taste more, drink more and think less in a solipsistically silly way and then throw up on someone's new Cole Haan's at a party of 779,583 people at East Beach in Charleston, RI.