So, I saw where the Applebee's in Seneca, SC has a Monday Night Football Kickoff Party that lasts until 2am. If there is a prospect more terrifying than an Applebee's in Seneca, SC at 1:59 am, I don't care to imagine it. The most logical explanation comes from the 1995 thriller Se7en. You may remember that it features the future Ms. Chris Martin's head in a box, but the arc of the film concerns a vigilante who is disgusted with contemporary society and enacts gruesome murders keyed to each of the seven deadly sins -- feeding an obese man until he dies, etc.
So, clearly, there are those who feel immoderate watching of football is a sin, and these people made this. The scenario I imagine: "Honey, you began the weekend shushing me during the Pitt/Cincy game, you stayed up until God knows when to watch San Jose St., you ignored your parenting and domestic responsibilities to watch the NFL all Sunday, but I want to take you to Applebee's for the Monday Night game." Fan calls for check sometime during the 4th quarter of the Monday night Ravens/Bengals, says something about having to work tomorrow, partner waves off server, orders another dozen grilled chicken wonton tacos, suggests a friendly wager on the SECOND Monday night game. Fan suffusedwith football, looks puzzled, as it dawns that there is no escape from this Applebees'.
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