THE GURGLING COD

Dang

I go and invent the Flickr Rebus, a bit of blog cheese I was confident would have my name in lights, and the subject of this first ever Flickr Rebus goes and writes a largely unobjectionable review of a perfectly decent sounding fancy Greek place. (OK, fancy Greek?! But I don't want to find flaming bottles of Ouzo in my mailbox, and spent most of my formative restaurant experiences at the lamented Acropolis,  enjoying lamb artichokes fricasee, and the semi-nude frescoes on the walls. Sweet!) They seem to have reined Frank in, and I'm kind of sad to see it.

A Flickr Rebus

Details soon!

Sexy Bourdain Nanny Beast

I hate to think of the Google referrals this title will bring, but it is the only way to describe the Cod's new favorite TV program,  Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares, which we discovered through the kind offices of Britopia, a correspondent of the cinetrix. Basically, Gordon Ramsay, a Brit celeb chef, roams through the hinterlands, delivering Supernanny-style smackdowns to the staff of non-functioning restaurants. By "non functioning" I do not mean "uninspired pan-Asian menus" but rather "fridges full of rotting food."  What makes it excellent is that he has that pottymouthed, hardcore pipeswinging English toughguy act down cold. Like Terrence Stamp. And he makes Cartman sound like Henry Higgins--portions of this ep resemble a test of  Emergency Broadcast System because the bleeped curses come so thick and fast. In light of the news, via the Wasters, that a  sitcom is being spun out of Kitchen Confidential, we need this program--it being British and all, not every ep has a happy ending, and backsliding makes good TV.

Bee-yoo-ty-ful!

Check the fennel technique! Learn more here, if you know Kanji. Tip of the fin to something slant. Busy this week: amuse yourselves as best you can.
 

Disintermediation

The buzz has been intense for the video for the Kidz Bop cover of Since U Been Gone, as it was for their cover of "Float On." Also recently buzzed about? Ted Leo covering Since U  Been Gone. Could we not cut Kelly Clarkson out of the equation and just have Kidz Bop cover Ted Leo songs?  I'd go with this tune, which would be real educational  (lyrics here) for the Kidz, and the video with the Kidz dressed up like T.E. Lawrence, Sierra Leonean warlords, and hard fellows from Belfast would rule. And it would be cool to hear them belting out the chorus. Seriously, though, this is quite a tune--imagine Holidays in Hell imbued with the conscience of some tortured bastard American scion of Graham Greene, and you have a pop song that makes you feel as if you have seen a movie. In my experience, the last to pull off the trick as successfully was Jim Carroll's "Freddy's Store" from the criminally neglected I Write Your Name.
  Ted Leo + Pharmacists "The Ballad of the Sin Eater" Hearts of Oak, Lookout!, 2003
Buy Hearts of Oak from the man himself. Better yet, catch them on tour. Or, best. see them at an all-ages show. You'll find that youthful enthusiasm is more engaging than the PBR-guzzling, arm-folding, head-nodding disaffection of your peers. The cinetrix and I took them in at the Earl in the fall,  and there was a knot of young fans who were eager to point out to us that they had dressed in black with roses in their hair as an hommage to "Tell Balgeary, Balgury is Dead." Awesome!

Shrimp Balls on the Road

You have not stumbled into the world of misheard lyrics, but rather tourist information from Changhua county government, in Taiwan, thanks to Rose's Lime. If you have June weddings on the horizon, remember--skip those tedious registries, and go for the roe: "Mullet roe is known to be good for health, so it is the best choice for gifts."

Weekend meat update

The keen-eyed cinetrix alerts me that La Depressionada has the DL on the first meat snack developed by a New York Football Giant since Lawrence Taylor's Theisman Drumettes. The Post seems skeptical about Michael Strahan's Pork Wings:

IF PIGS could fly, Michael Strahan wouldn't be peddling "pork wings," the signature dish of his new line of porcine products, Michael Strahan Master Grill Foods.

Again we see the limitations of partisan NY scandal sheets owned by megalomaniac penal colony escapees. Heah, we know all about flying pigs.Why not treat your friends on the wrong end of the Fung Wah to real pig wings?

Tonight's Special at English is Italian?

A carpaccio of Blue Steel. Thanks to our Chicago operatives for their outstanding achievements in the field of looking around toddenglish.com.

To the Class of 2005

Congratulations. Chores keep piling up here in Codland, so some hasty words of advice for grads from me and a special guest. If you are considering getting a Ph.D., (and why shouldn't you?) make sure you know what your schools doctoral  regalia looks like. You can check out most schools here.  Tulane? UT Dallas? Not for everyone. Even the WGU shade of scarlet  is a bit thongy for some. Conversely, Rice. Love the owls. So ready for Catchdubs primetime, it's like they come with matching Pumas. Speaking of Pumas, and as promised, some  words of advice from a special guest.

Todd English is playing at my house.

Bittman has been contrasting the difference between pro chefs and home cooks in his "Minimalist vs. Whomever" series. Similarly, there is a difference between the casual discussion of Bruni mixed in with labored hockey references, inessential music posts, and admonitions to raccoons you find here, and full-time, conservatory-trained board-certified Bruniologists. Just as your omlette will not be as good as Alain Ducasse's, the Cod is clearly the weak sister in the response to the Double Barreled Bruni in DI/DO this week. The redonkulosity of the Bruni Digest reaches new pinnacles. But if reviewing reviews of Todd English restaurants is fun, reviewing Todd English restaurants is even funner. Here is Grimes on an earlier Todd English effort. It sure makes you miss Grimes. Those who know the Cod know he has a soft spot for analogies, but this one is in the Ring of Honor:

He's the Thomas Wolfe of chefs. No sooner is a thought in his head than it's on the plate. His menu bristles with offerings like a jumbo chicken wing stuffed with foie gras and served on braised salsify with pistachio and truffle, or a fig and prosciutto tart in a rosemary crust, enriched and sweetened, almost to dessert level, by sweet and sour fig jam and Gorgonzola cheese.

What makes the whole thing for me is "bristles." Stay tuned for lentil action.

UPDATE: Hello, Tinglers. More involved explorations of the world of Bruni can be found here and  here, the latter with a coy reference to one of the great novels of the last half of the 20th century.