Foodie xxx ZOMG!

Clicking around for the previous post, I came across a dude in Seattle who wrote a post called "Suck it, Foodies," which is worth mentioning because it is such a perfect textbook troll. Foodies =

I do, always have, and will continue to vilify all those for whom the term "foodie" was invented--those coup-counting, lock-jawed, cake-eating, nose-in-the-air dimwits who, with sticks planted firmly in their flabby asses will make their weekly cruise out to the hottest addresses in town, get weak little culinary boners over year-dead trends, focused-grouped Frog-humping menus and anyone doing New American comfort food or French-Asian fusion in million-dollar spaces; who will swoon after "discovering" restaurants with 200 Yelp reviews, dismiss cheeseburgers and chicken-fried steak and sloppy tacos and Americanized Chinese food as beneath their notice, but go fucking bonkers for any restaurant that name-checks a farm on its menu.

Meanwhile, this guy's friends =

They are the antithesis of the opinionated, passionate, educated and open-minded grubnik and gastronaut. Give me the freaks, the weirdos, the obsessive and the crazed. Give me those running around with blood on their teeth and barbecue sauce in their hair, never satisfied with the conventional wisdom, never happy with the status quo, never content with simply enough. Herd-followers and bandwagon-jumpers are the bane of any live and vital restaurant scene--are agents only of homogeneity, nothing more--and I, for one (or two, I guess), have had enough of them for the rest of my life.

In other words, just like the first group, but real. It's a you say po-tay-o, but I say po-tat-o kind of thing, but po-tay-tos SUCK and po-tah-tos are AWESOME.  I would be about as excited about sitting next to a table of self-styled "gastronauts," or heaven help me, "grubniks," as I would a table of self-styled "foodies." I am guessing the difference is that the foodies would be snapping pix of every course w/ their iPhones, while the gastronauts would be using Droids. This kind of semiotic divide and agitate post, I guess, is how you keep people in Seattle tuned into your alt-weekly restaurant column. Instead, can't we all be happy we're not at an Olive Gardent  just get along? The Decendents think so: