THE GURGLING COD

The Black Caesar of Egg Nogs -- straight outta The Garden District

The generally estimable Hairpin goes off the rails with a series of vegan "egg" nogs each more terrifying than the last. Here is the idea you should have rolled with from the beginning. Don't thank the Cod, thank those NOLA Junior Leaguers, who, I believe, taught California how to party. Play us off, PE: 

Add Chick-fil-a thinks you are stupid

The Cod was there first, but glad to see Gawker piling on Chick-fil-a, and this is a great lede: 

When Chick-fil-A isn't spending millionstrying to clog the channels of gay rights legislation as effectively as their grease-soaked poultry mittens clog human arteries, the Atlanta-based restaurant chain expends its energy in equally productive ways. 

Unfurtunately, the intersection of Chick-fil-a regulars / kale sympathizers / Gawker readers is small. But for them, remember, you can make your own damn chicken sandwich. 

Poppin' bottles, watchin' the Giants get stomped?

So, it says here that the luxe sports bar is like, so hot right now. Either the NY Post is wrong about the broad appeal of sports bars w/ bottle service and table minimums, or Cod fave The Blue Seats was a victim of being from the future. (A year and a half later, they are still looking for the right spot to continue sharing their vision.) Best of all? DJs instead of game audio, because of, you know, chicks: 

On Sundays at the Ainsworth, it’s a nonstop halftime show under the chandeliers — when game sound is replaced by a thumping DJ. An absence of game sound is a hallmark of the new breed of sports bar — and a boon to many patrons, about half of whom are women (with or without dates).That’s part of the appeal for Kirsten Bohme, 27, a marketing coordinator for Diane von Furstenberg who recently sipped on a Red Bull and vodka at the Fulton. Though she doesn’t exactly dislike football, she admits she’s more into “the good vibe and the great music.”

Ouch. Good thing this is in NYC, a  noted hotbed of football Laodiceans,  rather than, say, Athens, GA, or Larry Munson would rise from the dead and do some serious temple-cleansing: 

Guiiteau Throwdown: Sam Sifton & Monica Byrne vs. Jim Davis and Karen Carpenter.

So, holiday weekend, living like Arafat, less said about Saturday the better + back to school at the end of the semester at the day job + November Rain? Sounds like a Guiteau Monday to me. But! Thanks to the exhortations of the cinetrix, spent last afternoon/evening putting together the mushroom lasagna that Sifton dropped in the Times mag. 

Like most of the actual cooking things that Sifton writes up, this one is compelling in the presentation, a little involved, but not daunting (see also ox tails and Korean sloppy Joes). It is, as one might imagine, a bit rich, but looks like it will travel well. Ironically, it's Garfield's own favorite food that's the silver lining in this Guiteau Monday. 

Pimento Cheese is a Hot Topic

As in Hot Topic? Well, some pimento cheese would look good on the front of that fake Ramones tee, but actually, in this case, our friends at Eater round up some chef stories in re Pimento Cheese. We are very grateful to them for their support of Pimento Cheese Awareness Month. And any excuse to listen to Le Tigre. Play us off, ladies: 

Fox News: Pepper spray "a food product, essentially."

OK, so the geniuses at Fox have a fabulous spin on the UC-Davis pepper spray debacle:

"I don't think we have the right to Monday-morning quarterback the police," O'Reilly says, "particularly at a place like UC Davis, which is a fairly liberal campus." God forbid! We'd never want to question Lt. John Pike's decision to generously and indifferently dust peacefully sitting protesters with pepper spray from only a few feet away. Especially given that Davis is, you know, a liberal campus! And, gosh, even if we were going to Monday-morning quarterback the police, shouldn't we remember, as Megyn Kelly tells O'Reilly, that pepper spray is "a food product, essentially"?

As is so often the case, Chris Onstad is a prophet you oughtta listen to. It's not a weapon used against peaceful protesters, it's a hot sauce that takes you out of your moral comfort zone

. 

News flash: chicken is not kale

So, tasty, albeit homophobic fast food chain Chick-fil-a is sweating a tiny VT outfit about a trademark. The ish? The fried chicken sandwich folks fear that folks will confuse the eatmorekale.com brand with their Eat Mor Chikin campaign. For your convenience, Chick-fil-a's flagship product at left, and kale at right. So, Chick-fil-a customers -- ask yourself: how stupid does Chick-fil-a think you are? In any case, sign the petition and tell the fast food behemoth to back up. 

Guiteau on the go

Gastropoda has your Guiteau right here: http://t.co/E7kZQJBP

A stake in the heart of Irene

A bittersweet day here in the 802, as aforementioned. But some good news. Call it Speciality Foods Iwo Jima, or not as you prefer, but the Woodstock Farmers Market is back in business, just weeks after Hurricane Irene literally wrecked the shop. 

Hasty, ill-considered gameday menu - LSU/Ole Miss & Oregon USC

The Cod is out of pocket in the 802, thanking a good man for a good life. Our lads are headed north, too, wrapping up the conference slate against the Wolfpack, with a minimum of fuss one, hopes. The marquee action is later, as Ole Miss attempts to slip a pickle in LSU's punchbowl, and the Trojans attempt to rain on the Ducks' parade. So good coastal action in a month that has an R in it (except for in New England). Get you some local oysters from the Gulf or the Pacific, some oyster knives, some lemons, a bit of hot sauce, some mignonette, if you're nasty, and call it a party.